I didn’t realize how long it has been since I have written here. Wow time is flying…. Here’s my rambling for today.
You know that feeling when you need to say no, I can’t but don’t want to disappoint others, be judged or end up feeling guilty? Well the universe gave me that gift this morning, times 3.
Sleep has been elusive this week. Not because I’m worried or thinking. Not because I was in pain. No reason in particular, it is just the way I am sometimes. And Full Moons don’t help. And then today I had 3 invitations, all wonderful invitations!
But what I really needed was to stay home and nurture myself. (Hopefully take a nap!) When I don’t get enough sleep my empathic gifts are much louder, less managed. Everything seems so loud, noises, energy, feelings….. Because the neural pathways are overstimulated, they need time to rest too.
My life long pattern would have been to find a way to say yes to all of them. Those kind of patterns come up, almost every time, they are neurological pathways. But every time I make a different choice I am strengthening the new neural pathway. Making that new choice easier and easier to make. So I said, no thank you 3 times. And all 3 responses where loving!
When we say yes to self care and are brave enough to share that with others, we help empower them to make that same choice. To put self first, to give ourself what we need. Simply because we are worth it. Every single one of us! Just because we are! We are all Sourse Energy. We are all One. And We Are All Worthy Because We are Love!
Let us build our New Earth with a culture that completely understands the value of Self Care!
Part of doing that is also becoming aware of our own judgement of our and others self care. We are all one but we are all completely individual, living completely different lives. So of course our needs are not going to be the same. May we find that place of Neutrality. When we stop judging ourselves, we can stop judging others And when we stop judging others, we can stop judging ourselves. As Within so Without.
I hope for you lots of Self Care, Neutrality and Sleep! Much Love!
I am struggling this morning to forgive someone, I went into meditation to ask for help, after a little bit I heard go write about it and share. I sense they wanted me to share this because so many of us are having things come up in this season of change, that we have a choice about. We either decide to hold the pain and all the yucky, humiliating and shameful stories we tell ourselves about that thing. Or we can forgive.
So, let’s talk about forgiveness for a bit. Forgiveness is NOT saying to another it’s ok what you did to me. Hear me, not that!!! Forgiveness is really “I am not going to let what you did to me hurt me over and over again”. I am not going to run my life based on untrue things that you told me or that I inferred. I am not going to keep suffering, while you stand by unaware that you have even done anything wrong. I am not going to let the devistating pain you left me with ruin m y life. I am going to set my self free from all that pain and struggle by forgiving you, by detaching from what you did and seeing from a higher perspective.
All are joined in the oneness of love. So any attack I have on another is an attack on myself. Energetically and spiritually anger, vengefulness, hate filled thoughts are acts of attack. So we are sending that yuck to ourselves, as well as drawing more of that into our lives, to prove the story we are telling ourselves. You’ve heard that saying that resentment is like taking poison hoping the other person gets sick… It just doesn’t work.
Psychologically, if I believe that someone hurt me, then I also believe in the consequences of that hurtful act. For example, If someone tells you that you are not good enough, and you believe them, then you start to feel not good enough and act in ways that make you seem not good enough.
So, it becomes a question of faith. Am I going to believe in this unloving act as truth and then build my life and choices around that hurt. Or am I going to believe in the Love that created the Universe, the Love that connects us all, the Love that is who each of us is at our core. And allow that Love to flow through me every day and shoot for every minute? Do I put my faith in the loneliness or enteral connection? Do I believe in my unworthiness or do I believe in the worthiness of every child, woman and man? Do I put my faith in separation and injustice or do I believe that we are all one and we can figure this out? Where are you putting your faith?
Forgiveness does not mean that you allow yourself to be taken advantage of or used. Forgiveness holds within it Discernment. The discernment, without judgement for everyone is one their own path, to say this person, place or thing isn’t good for me. That’s all it is “this isn’t good for me”. Unfortunately, we humans have been taught that we must justify such things, which becomes a whole other ego story to create more pain. Simply allowing “this isn’t good for me” to be true and then taking LOVING action to honor that knowing.
During this season of our evolution as a species we are being asked to let go of all the old stories, hurts and limitation. Because we need to change the world. That is why we decided to be here on Mother Earth at such a tumultuous time of change. So that we can be Love. So that we can do our work and therefore impact the whole. Because we are all one at our core.
So if you are struggling with forgiveness this morning, I hope this helps. It most certainly helped me to share about it with you. Huh, my guides were right on the mark. Imagine that! Spirit, Love sent the answer. Love sent the miracle. The miracle is when I shift my attention to Love!
The miracle is when we shift our attention to Love!
My wish for you my fellow journeyers is freedom, forgiveness and a shift in your attention to Love. Just for today or even just for this minute. And in the next moment, deciding again.
A Course in Miracles states “It is not your job to seek for Love but rather to seek within yourself all the barriers you hold against its coming”. As I ponder that the past few days, I am struck but something, that Love is coming. Because really, Love is all there is. Love is the force that created the universe. Love is the force that makes Oak trees out of acorns. Love is the lifeblood of all that is. Love is the essence of you and me. Love is already here. All around us.
And yet we have so many barriers to it. Any story that we believe about who or what we are; is a barrier. Any wounds or trauma that we hold onto; is a barrier to Love. Anything that we learned about who we are based on what other people thought or did; is a barrier. Every place that we protect ourselves or dim our light or hide; is a barrier to Love. We all have barriers to love, each one of us. Some of those barriers are conscious, meaning we know about them. Some of those barriers are unconscious and we do not yet know about them. Some barriers are energetic, others are thought forms or beliefs. Some barriers are generational, barriers that our family has had for generation after generation; barriers that were taught energetically, emotionally, physically, mentally. So many barriers. Another way to say this is so much healing to do.
When we heal our issues, our wounds and our unrecognized beliefs; we make room to vibrationally hold more Love and Light. Perhaps a better way to say it is, when we heal, we become more fully who we really are. We open to and surrender to the Love that is our true essence.
One of the ways to do this healing work is through sound. Sound has the power to bring the unconscious forward to be healed and released. Sound has the power to clear away energetic blocks or barriers to being your authentic self. Sound and vibration can bring the bodies back into alignment, allowing us to hold more light, more Love. Light Language has the power to activate, attune and initiate deeper levels of understanding, wisdom and healing.
Tomorrow night, on the Equinox, as we still bask in the energy of the Full Moon, I would invite you to join me for a Sound Healing Bath as we open to the healing transformational energies that will be coming in for our personal and collective evolution. As we willingly let go of the barriers we hold to love; we allow the healing energies and sounds to bring us back in to divine alignment and balance. Balance of the light and the dark within; the feminine and masculine within and spirit and the physical. Together we align with Divine intent, with the Love that powers the Universe and blast our co-creative intentions through the equinox portal opening to our new reality.
We are the anchors of light in a time before time. In a place of above and below. In a place of emptiness yet fullness. We hold and direct the streams of light emanating from the creator.
Tap into your perfect stream and open to the wisdom we intend to transfer. Open to the healing, guiding, ever evolving light of higher consciousness. Allow the sounds and vibrations of past, present and future to heal on all time lines and all dimensions. Allow the higher dimensional light to unfold a new aspect of your DNA, propelling you into the next evolution of humanity, opening up to Higher and higher dimensions.
Anchor your hearts desire into the stream of creation, allow the Ancient of days to co-create with you.Call to us when you need guidance, support, clarity, fuel for the fire of action. Call to us when you are unsure of your next steps or when you are afraid. Call to us when you need grounding, when you need centering, when you need wisdom. Call to us so that we can remind you, that you are just as us; powerful beings of love, ready to take the next steps on your ascension path. Trust, surrender and allow; this is all that is needed from you for the Divine to begin to flow through you, as you; for it is who you really are.
Be in flow with Gaia, attend to the seasons to optimize your ability to flow with the twists and turns of life. Nurture your inner world as you would a garden, from the seeds being planted in the dark, to the seedlings that begin to peek through. Know that you are in harmony with the Great Mother, know that your connection to her anchors your dreams into her reality, into her matrix.
Your dreams feed the dreams of the collective and are anchoring in the changes that you dream of as light workers. You are co-creating the New Earth. Your dreams are becoming manifest. Focus your attention on the areas of growth and change. Feed the seeds that you wish to flourish. Allow the seedlings of fear, envy, greed to parish by attending to where you put your focus, your attention, your energy.
Spend time within to prepare for the seeds of new growth. Connect deeply to the Mothers Matrix and anchor your dreams. Plant your seeds. Create. Become. Be the Goddess of the Earth that you already are.
Open to Love with all your heart, all of your being. Love is an energy. Love is the force that created the universe. Love is the magic that allows a tiny acorn to be transformed into the majesty of the mighty Oak.
Love is the power that causes your bodies to breath and your hearts to beat. Love is the essence of all that is. There is no thing that isn’t love at an energetic level. Love it the essence of who you are. It is always fully present within you. All that is required is that you open up to it.
Allow Love to surround you, fill you up. Allow yourselves to feel that love. As you do this, Love will begin flowing through you to others. It can only be so; as Love can only move, flow. it is never still always pushing forward, growing, evolving. As you allow Love to become who you are; that will also be true of you. Growth, transformation and alchemy are the natural consequences of embodying Love.
Guilt has been coming up for so many of us lately. As we live in the energies of the recent solar eclipse for the next several months we are being asked to look at our shadow sides or the parts of ourselves that we would rather not be there. I decided I would look up the official definition of guilt; it is defined as “the fact of having committed a specific or implied defense”. And there are times when each of us has felt guilty for something that we have done or not done or that we wish we could do differently. I think this is a human emotion to encourage living in integrity. Guilt is however an emotion to be experienced, not lived in.
The dictionary also had an informal definition of guilt, used as a verb; “make (someone) feel guilty, especially in order to induce them to do something.” So often we have been taught by life to feel guilty for so many things, in ways that do not really make sense, logically. How many of us can look back at family history and see that guilt was the weapon of choice used by so many families for generation after generation. Or can look back and see that the choices made from guilt lead us to dark, heavy, difficult experiences.
The reality is that no matter how we experience guilt, it can keep us stuck. Let’s look at how that works. Guilt is a lower vibrational feeling. So, when we allow ourselves to sit down in guilt, to become overwhelmed by regret or shame, we are lowering our vibration. Which keeps us from being able to see from a higher perspective, making it much more difficult to find the momentum of change and growth.
These heavy energies can get stuck on our emotional bodies and cause a host of physical and mental challenges. Because guilt is an emotion that is experienced in the moment, when guilt becomes a way of life it manifests as depression, shame, unworthiness, self-sabotage and more. When we repeatedly feel guilty for our thoughts, feelings, opinions or actions; we begin to question our own agency or ability to make valid choices, our worthiness to be loved and accepted, our value.
Guilt and shame is also a tool used by the mind (or ego) to keep things the same, safe, comfortable and familiar. Yes, even though guilt is an uncomfortable feeling, it is known, we know what to expect and what is expected from us…. The reason our minds want us to stay the same is because change is unknowable, uncomfortable, even scary.
The truth is that everything always changes. Nothing ever stays the same. You and I are not the same people we were yesterday. The “idea” that things stay the same is just that, an idea. An illusion created by the mind.
As many of my fellow “Seekers” have experienced, healing, transformation, spiritual growth seems to draw us; it seems to be woven into the fabric of reality; calling our names, beckoning us to surrender to the flow of love that creates the universe through us, as us. If everything changes, why not put our intention and focus on changing in a way that will best serve ourselves and the world.
Working with and letting go of guilt will cause change, it will allow for higher vibrational energies. Those higher vibes will encourage us to see from a higher perspective, from a place of love and compassion, for ourselves and others. Letting go of guilt even seems to deepen the connection to our authentic selves, allowing for a redefining of values, relationships and self-worth. Stepping out of guilt allows for being more present, more open, more at peace and more joy.
As I have walked my own journey I found 5 stones that are helpful in releasing and transmuting guilt.
Peridot –opens, cleanses and activates the heart and solar plexus chakras and releases old hurts, wounds and guilt. It is a stone of compassion. Teaches to detach from outside influences to look within for guidance. Peridot encourages doing the work to release patterns and old vibrations so that a new path or direction can be found. It has a friendly energy and is excellent for healing. It enhances confidence and assertiveness, balanced by patience and clarity of thought.
Larimar – Spiritually empowering, dissolving boundaries that constrain the spiritual self and guiding to the soul’s true path. Larimar removes self-imposed blockages, dissolves self-sabotaging behavior, especially a tendency toward martyrdom. It is particularly helpful with removing guilt and fear while healing trauma to the heart. When moving through periods of stress or change, it enables meeting challenges with balance. Larimar is a stone of clear communication, provides strength and courage to speak openly from the heart.
Chrysocolla – gives renewed strength and balance. Calms, cleans and reenergizes all the chakras and aligns them with the divine. Draws out guilt and reverses destructive emotional programming. Heals heartache and increases the capacity to love. Improves communication, encourages growth and opens psychic vision. Encourages self-awareness and inner balance. Enhances personal power and creativity.
Chiastolite – Cross Stone – a powerful protective stone. Dissolves illusions, clears feelings of guilt, stabilizes emotions and calms fears, enabling you to face reality. Aids in transition from one situation to another and with releasing unhealthy patterns and conditioning. Aids with problem solving by strengthening analytic capabilities. Assist in tuning into soul’s purpose. Aid in changing negative energy into positive, and fosters harmony and peace. Stimulates and energizes the root chakra as well as the crown chakra. This energy will then aid the activation of both the earth chakra below your feet and the soul star chakra above the head.
Sodalite – instills a drive for truth and an urge toward optimism making it possible to remain true to yourself and stand for your beliefs. It eliminates confusion, fear and guilt. it encourages rational thought, objectivity, truth and intuitive perception together with verbalizing feelings. Sodalite stimulates releasing habitual thoughts, behaviors and limiting beliefs. It also fosters knowledge, logic, rationality, efficiency, learning, consciousness, communication and wisdom.
May these amazing crystals be helpful to you on your journey to transmute guilt, shame and regret.
As we open to the transformational energies that are being ushered in, the beautiful pink full moon reminds us to release what no longer serves. Reminding us that letting go is followed by a filling up.
Last night Mama Killa, our beautiful moon, was full; drawing us near, filling us with awe and wonder. A symphony of crickets, frogs, hoots, pups and the crackle of the fire provided a healing, cleansing, upgrading melody from Pacha Mama, Mother Earth. A Light Language song from a Blue Star came through to add to the magic.
So, if you feel called, settle in, allow the sounds to carry you inward and be open to revelation, insight and the Love that is always closer than close.
Sitting outside, connecting with Pacha Mama, on this 60 degree February morning, marveling at the first glimpses of spring starting to peek out. When a crow caught my attention, cawing, as if to say transformation is at hand. My first thought was Great Spirit let it be with ease and grace please! And I immediately heard… Why don’t you just choose the easier way, just let go and trust.
Wow! Right? What if I just take the next step that is in front of me? Rather than trying to find another way. Or worrying about “what ifs”. Or concerning myself with how that person might feel or what might happen there. What if I /we just trusted; trusted our self, trusted Spirit.
What if the ease and grace comes from our decisions, our choices. Choosing to stay connected, choosing to follow the nudging and synchronicities. Choosing to let go of things that are not good for us, the people, situations, past hurts, resentments…. Maybe the struggle, the suffering, the confusion comes from trying to figure it all out. From the need to “know”.
Today the crow came to say trust; trust that part of you that is divine, that part that is connected to All That Is. With a beginners mind, take the next step presented and trust. Instead of asking for Ease and Grace, let’s give our selves the freedom to live in ease and grace. Isn’t that who we really are?
My attempt at putting my beloved Stag Spirit Animal on paper.
Deer Medicine
What magnifican creatures! Deer captures our attention with its beauty and grace. And the mighty stag is a symbol of the heart and is often used to represent the Goddess. When deer comes into our life they remind us to sink deep into who we really are, at our heart… that place of innocence, deep love and grace. They remind us to live in equanimity, in balance. And to spend time in meditation, facing into the depth.
Deer are one of the most adaptable mammals; they live on all but one continent and in every climate. Flexibility, adaptability is at the core of our spiritual path. To find Spirit in each moment we have to be willing to let go of every thing we think we know; to look again with wonder and curiosity. Deer medicine assists us in our ability to go with the flow. Call in Deer is you feel your getting stuck in a rut or struggling with change.
The gentleness, innocence and grace of the deer mystify many. Deer reminds us to offer gentleness and grace to others and ourselves. As we do our personal work, the work of looking within, facing our shadow, embracing our own Divinity; we must approach our selves with gentleness, compassion and grace. This stance allows us to embrace all of ourselves, even our shadow parts. Bringing us more into fullness and freedom.
Antlers are symbolic of antennae; connecting to higher realms and symbolize Higher Wisdom. Reminding us to pay attention to inner feelings, intuitions. Stags shed their antlers every year; symbolizing new perspectives and gentle growth. The antlers grow from behind the eye, further strengthening the message to pay attention to inner sight.
Our ancestors included deer in their stories and myths to represent new beginnings. Call Deer to help usher in new phases with innocence, gentleness and flexibility.
Journey "There" 