Category Archives: Mental Health

Holding Space

When someone we love is angry with us. Or experiencing emotions we don’t quite understand. Or has pulled away. We have choices.

One choice is to continue loving them. Believing in them. Holding space for them. Yes, we feel our own feelings. We honor that we are sad or hurt. And we nurture ourselves through those feelings. But despite what we are feeling, we remember we love them. We let ourselves see who they really are, the very reason we love them. And we recognize that they are going through something. That something is part of their processs. Part of their Becoming. So we take a deep breath and we love…

Lets be clear, holding space doesn’t mean we are approving of the other’s behaviors. Just that we are letting go. Holding a vision for the Highest Good of all involved. That we have enough wisdom to remember that we ourselves have done, felt, said things that we later could see were not in alignment with who we want to be. Holding space means we understand that being human is sometimes difficult and that sometimes life is hard. Holding space means that we understand that each of us has lessons about living to learn. And that some of us learn quickly and others of us have to take more difficult paths. And most importantly, I think, holding space means we stay out of judgment and reaction. That we do the inner work that allows us to be at peace while we are experiencing difficult or painful situations.

The other option often feels much easier, because it is comfortable, we are familiar with it. Used to it. We let the others behavior become part of our story. (When I speak of “story” I am speaking of the things we tell ourselves about who we are and how the world sees us) What that means about us. What that means about them. What others might think about us. And the story grows. And the feelings about the story grow. And the story, the one we just made up in our head, becomes our truth. When it actually may not be based in reality at all. When it’s really only one possibility in a magnificent ocean of possibilities.

And I wonder, is the story really just an escape route from feeling the original feelings and looking at our selves; a bypass around the work we need to do on ourselves to evolve. What part did I play in this? Where do I need to grow or change? Why am I reacting this way? Do I need to set boundaries or is it time for my boundaries to change? Am I being called to act from a Higher Perspective? Am I being asked to trust or surrender or forgive?

If we react to the situation, we may be losing an opportunity to evolve, to raise consciousness, to be the change we want to see. If we react we may cause harm to the other. We may burn bridges that we don’t want to burn. We may slip into depression or withdraw. Because when we react, we are reacting from a place of hurt. That place that Eckhart Tolle calls the pain body, holds all of the hurts from the past. So reacting from that place of hurt causes our reaction to be bigger and stronger than is often appropriate. And reacting from there reinforces the subconscious belief that I am not responsible for my actions, my feelings and my choices.

It’s hard to be open, honest and vulnerable with ourselves!! That’s were growth, evolution beings. And it feels like “holy cow! Now I have to do what!”  But when we see things happening over and over in our life, we have to go within. And find the lesson. Then, once we have taken an honest look, we can be grateful for the teacher.

Much Munay!

Autumn

Protecting Your Mood as the Days Shorten into Winter

Protecting Your Mood as the Days Shorten into Winter

As the days shorten, leaves fall, and cold starts to creep in, we need to protect our mood, our emotional wellbeing. There are some simple acts of self-care that can help. I know, we hear self-care sometimes and kinda roll our eyes, and think yeah, yeah….. But when we are healthy, happy and hopeful; we are so much better in the world, in our relationships, in our spiritual journeys. And if we are really honest we owe it to creation, the creator, each other, ourselves to be our best highest self. So carve out some time for You as we enter a time of stillness and introspection.

  • Make time to get outside. As the days shorten, our time in the sun diminishes so does our vitamin D. Vitamin D is an important part of keeping our mood balanced. So in the fall and winter we need to make time to go outside when we can. Maybe take a walk at lunch. Take a break mid afternoon and just go sit in the sun for 15 mins.
  • Get a plant for your desk or buy yourself flowers at the grocery store. Live plants give of oxygen and help to purify the air. And bringing nature inside helps us to be more hopeful. My hubby calls our kitchen “the jungle” in the winter, but I love it! (Pic of the Jungle below.)
  • Rocks! Of course rocks! Crystals can assist with balancing mood. Lithium, Amber, Moss Agate, Orange Calcite and Black Obsidian are just a few.  See Traveling Wands Here
  • Carve out some time to be with friends and loved ones. Winter’s cold can cause us to stay in more, be more isolated and that loneliness can lead to the blues. So choose to spend time with people that make you smile, that both share and listen and that really get you.
  • Listen to music, sing or tone. Music uses more of our brain that any other activity. Music can lift our mood, change our perspective, even raise our vibration. However, be careful of the music you choose, sad music can make us sadder. So choose songs that make you feel good and sing your heart out.
  • Be careful of your food choices. Cold weather causes many of us to look for “comfort” foods. But too many carbs and not enough raw fruits and veggies can impact our mood.
  • Meditate…. Even if you start with 15 mins a day. Meditation has been scientifically proven to lower stress and improve outlook. It brings us back to center, reminds us of who we really are and why we are here on the beautiful planet. Meditation is simple, but not easy, but the effort is so worth it. You can find lots of guided meditations on the web. I use music with Bi-neural Technology. Bi-neural beats help to induce a relaxed state of mind, and who doesn’t need that.

And remember, if you feel your self struggling with depression, find a good counselor to talk to. Struggling with depression alone is never a good idea. And there is always HOPE, even when we can’t feel it.

Here’s to a great fall and winter full of hope and Munay!

 

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The Jungle